Well, it's morning - sort of. Got a full nights sleep, I've been painting and am feeling a little better about being me. The plan today:

• Go to the post office
• walk Bugsy
• take Bugsy somewhere where he can run
• return my small stack of returnable items
• come home paint, work on the set of 13 "We didn't make them stop" set
• finish new logo
• shower
• walk Bugsy again
• got to Newport opening
• DO NOT eat anything unnecessary
• DO NOT piss anyone off

I am feeling more optomistic today because I have tools and a plan (fail to plan, plan to fail) but my future ultimately depends n other people and that's usually where I fail. We shall see how far I get ahead but I haven
t had the best of luck when I've had to depend on other people - for years, I wasn't someone who could be depended on due to several addictions and outside factors but I've also never known what it's like to have someone I could depend on. My future rests in the hands of people I haven't met yet, people who could look at me and see what people have always seen - a  nobody but I'm hoping I can change that. I can't change my age, which already gives me a huge disadvantage, I can change my weight (working on it), and I can change people's minds about my abilities thru my work....which is my strongest advantage. My work.

Speaking of work, feeling pretty good  today (minimal physical pain) so I'd better get to work.