Monday, November 7, 2011

11/07 What's up smock?

So for the past few days I've been cleaning house - cleaning out my storage unit, the Cave and my my truck of crap. Years and years and years of crap. Since my truck got broken into, and the thugs stole something that was incredibly valuable to me, I've been on  a mission to just purge myself of stuff. However, depending on the time of day and my mood, it all matters in a way but I know I don't want to carry all this stuff around with me forever. It gets very weighty.

Purging is liberating, depressing, exciting and really hard. Some of this stuff defines who I am but it also defines who I was which is far less fun. Some of the stuff brings back horrible feelings, some of it is hard to get rid of because I feel a certain loyalty to the spirit of it and the time it came from. I think, just having those thoughts, technically makes me a hoarder on some level which is why whenever I have a strong feeling one way or another towards an object I toss it. There's a reason for the strong attachment(s) to the stuff but I'm trying to keep in mind - it's just stuff and no thing should hold that much importance in my life...except for my work.

That said, even though I've gone thru about 4 dozen boxes of stuff so far I still have a lot of stuff. It's annoying. How can one person have so much stuff? It's not keeping me safe or helping me in anyway. It's costly, demanding, exhausting and just dumb. But then again, it feels so good when I make it go away. I may not want the relief I get when I purge to end for a while. Okay that sounded bizarre.

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